I’m excited to have the first ever guest blogger here. I’ve learned a lot from Sarah over the last eight months. I was turned on to her blog by Lindsey Nobles. Over the last few months Sarah has been tackling her fears head on. You can check out her VLogs on fear here and here.
The older I get the easier it is to dismiss real fear as personality quirks.
“I don’t DO waterslides.” She says as she covers up under a towel and sits her rear end on a bench.
“I’m just not a party planner.” She whines when someone volunteers her for a job that she does not want to do.
“Oh, no…I’m not good in large groups of women. I prefer one on one conversations.” She explains when she’s invited out.
But in reality, it’s all just fear. Fear of silly things like heights and speed. Fear of the pressure to perform under time constraints. Fear of the exposure of not being the “life of the party” and having no one laugh at my jokes.
Fear. I guess in the past I’ve allowed it to define me.
I’d rather have courage define me.
I’d rather be the one that someone invites BECAUSE she’ll jump of the pier and get her clothes and hair wet. I’d rather be the one that races her eight-year-old to the top of the waterslide to see who will be the first one down. I’d rather look at responsibilities and performance issues in the face and say, YES, I will do it and I’m not afraid.
It’s much more fun to have courage define me rather than fear.
Fear keeps me quiet. It keeps me stationary. It keeps me glued to the earth when I should be moving forward.
Fear even keeps my personality slowing trudging toward the retirement home someday where, God forbid, I fall asleep in my wheelchair scared to leave my assisted living room.
Oh yes, I will get old someday. And I may be tempted more and more to dismiss my fears and misgivings as just “who I am”. And yes, I might fall asleep during dinner when I’m 98.
Instead I want to be that courageous old lady who gathers you up and says, “Let me tell you a story, because I’ve got hundreds of them.”
I hope that who I am learning to become is a woman defined by courage and not defined by fear.
Prudence is a 30-something writer who lives in Arizona with her husband Shawn and their chihuahuas Lengua and Zeus. She writes her life, her experiences and her crawl back to hope. Eventually, she hopes to visit India – a place that’s captured her heart without ever stepping foot on the soil.